Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Life goes on, always

Being an open book is not how I'd like to be known as, ever. But right now, all self-preservation and self-consciousness can be sucked out of the window for all I care. Cause' at the state I'm in right now, all my mind's constantly reminding me about is how lonely my nights are and how my actions and decisions have consequently led me to feel this way. It maybe sudden and the timing might not be perfect, but I'm also feeling a strange thud in my heart to write about LOVE - after such a long time. Instead of it being a love felt for another, this time, it's self-love.

I recently wrote a short story which was also an essay for my recent English paper. Since I'm in a very sharing mood, I've decided to type it out here and share it with all of you... Enjoy!

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The city of Los Angeles is a very delectable place during the summer season; filled with summer romance, pleasure, fun and excitement. The mighty sun never fails to beam its beautiful rays just as lovely flower buds never fail to bloom. The view is almost picturesque. It is a time when teenagers go off to find a semester job just so that they could earn enough to purchase a car or lend a helping hand to their parents in the financial department. A time when children refuse to return to their homes because the weather is just right for them to play outdoors. A time when all the beaches are undoubtedly packed like tuna with people whom are flopped the other way around in hopes of getting an awesome sun tan. It is also a time when cupid is most active doing match-making and giving lonely souls a chance at love. Well, it was so for Katie.

Katie, a down-town Texas country girl, decided to start a new life in Los Angeles after returning from England, where she went to further her studies. There in England, on one occasion while she was roaming the magnificent streets of the U.K, she bumped into a tall, lithe man whose face was deeply tanned, his hair vitally thick as black as his onyx eyes. He was edgy and handsome, just the way she has always pictured her dream man to be. Judging from his appearance and the way he presents himself, Katie knew in her heart that he was a womanizer. He knew all the right things to say, at all the right times and Katie knew better than to fall for textbook pick-up lines and meaningless gestures. But as luck would have it, she fell for him anyway. Hard. His name is Sean. He is a bartender at one of the hottest clubs in Los Angeles. After just three days of being in each other’s company, Katie gave her heart to him and wherever he went, she would follow. Three days was all it took for her to fall in love with him. Three short, unforgettable days.

Until one night, after a wonderful candlelight dinner together, he told her that he will be leaving for Spain in a few days. He told her that he was given a job promotion and would be settling down there until a better job came along. While he was saying those words, she felt as if arrows had pierced through her heart. She was crushed beyond words and her world instantaneously came crumbling down around her. He was everything to her, she had made him her everything. With the little spark of hope that was left, she suggested that she tagged along. She was willing to leave her whole life behind, everything that she had worked for in the name of love. But as she suggested her proposal, he denied her without any thought. After having denied her, there was a guilt written all over his face. There must be more to the story than what he's telling me, she thought to herself. So she began pestering him, asking him more and more questions out of curiosity until he lets the cat out of the bag.

After all the pestering, he finally confessed to something else, something so much more heart-aching and devastating than she had ever imagined. He confessed to having an affair with a co-worker of his which has been going on for several months now. He also confessed that the main reason he will be leaving for Spain is to live with her and her family. That was all Katie needed to know, the truth. Katie tried to stand up for herself with whatever dignity she had left but not even a single word was uttered. She was speechless but now with more raging anger. She felt he needed a good punch in the face and a kick in his groin. Being too softhearted, she couldn't bring herself to do so. So, without so much as a 'goodbye' or a 'take care', she walked away from him. Tears welled up in her eyes as she swore to herself to never let her guard down and fall in love, ever again.

Several months flew by and she was getting skinnier and skinnier by each passing day. She had lost her appetite and her mood was definitely not helping in keeping her friends close to her. Her friends and family reached out to her in hopes they would be of any help but she shut them out. She was in no mood for pep-talks or any stories from good and well-intentioned relatives and friends. She quit her job as a magazine editor and resigned herself to finding solace in all the books that were piled all over her living space, just waiting to be read. This melt-down stretched on for two long years. She gave up on everything - her career, her love-life, her loved ones - and worst of all, she gave up on herself.

One day on her way back home from running a few daily errands, something urged her to take a different path rather than the one she usually took. Listening to her instincts, she followed through. While walking down the new, unfamiliar path, she heard a faint, soft whisper calling out to her. She looked all around her to see where that voice was coming from and then managed to trace it back to the orphanage that was just around the corner. It was a voice of a little girl. Hesitantly, she walked towards the orphanage to find out why that little girl was calling out to her. Before she knew it, they were engaged in a very deep conversation. Aurora was her name. Throughout her life, she has never experienced how it is like to be in a family, to be loved. Her parents were involved in a car accident when she was just 5 years old and there were no relatives in town to look after her, so she lived on the streets. Until one lucky day, a kind soul brought her into an orphanage and gave her a place to sleep in, meals to fill her empty stomach and company to keep whatever that is left of her childhood, alive.

After listening to what this little girl had been though, Katie realized that her life is so much worth being grateful for. Suddenly, she was filled with determination to get her life back on track. Sorting her plans for her comeback, she made a run for it. She thanked that little girl for boosting her confidence and for helping her to realize how much more there is to life. She ran all the way home and started working on ways to make life worth-living once again.

In a matter of no time, she picked herself up, got right back on her feet and she took up a job as a writer - an ambition she had always dreamed of as a little girl. In four years, she had already written 5 bestselling novels. It was during one night at a Book Awards event, when she walked away with 3 awards for best love/romance novels that she never felt so overwhelmed of her accomplishment.  She told herself that she had everything she could ever want and then some. She had a successful career and everything was going according to her whim and fancy but when it came to love, there was no man in her heart. However, she decided that she didn't need a man in her life to make her feel happy and loved. She was capable of doing so all on her own. She was happy in her own skin. That night, she eventually found love; in herself. When the event came to an end, she left with a smile on her face. A smile that, she thought to herself, would last for quite some time. Because she believed that no matter what, life goes on...

P.S - This story will be published in this year's school magazine. With love, enjoy!

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