Sometimes when people are right in front of you, they tend to be overlooked or simply just taken for granted. In my case, they are my friends. The handful of them whom have been there for me during the bad times (recently) when a portion of my world came crashing down into bits and pieces. When ignorance became my best friend - I ignored everyone who so much as called or texted me, asking how I was coping. And during good times, when no trace of neither betrayal nor melancholy was to be found.
As much as I've thanked them time and time again for just being there, I somehow feel as if it is - or will never - be enough. But rest assured, the price for such sincere tenderness and kindness will soon be paid.
After days of being disconnected with my creative juices, it's all starting to bubble and boil once again. Which is one of the reasons I am now typing my life's recent happenings for the world to see. Recent happenings which I will talk more about later, further along this post. Besides this particular entry, I have tons of ideas for upcoming journal entries. All of which are not going to be leaked out anywhere until it's published by none other than myself.
Just yesterday, being a person who lives to eat, Uncle Zani invited us to dinner at his recent favourite restaurant; PapaRich. It was truly a wonderful time spent with my mum's side of the family as it has been awhile. I was reminded of how much I missed those loud hysterical laughs due to the jokes that were told and seeing seriousness on everyone's faces when the conversation was about something tragic. Usually, such fun outings only happen when the brother-in-laws initiate get-togethers among themselves and my siblings and I get to tag along with my Dad. Yesterday, was pretty out of the ordinary, so to speak. We all enjoyed mouth-watering Malaysian cuisines and moved on to Wahab's for some slurp-worthy cendol. This goes to show that with a tight-knitted family, the only key to it is Time. Because you can have all the riches in the world, have everything your eyes sparkle towards and claim you have found happiness when all this while, true happiness lies in the palm of your hands when all is right back at Home.
On a more personal note, I've noticed that quite a number of people have been getting on my nerves lately. Just a few of those people. I still can't seem to wrap my head around everything that has been going on. Especially with this particular nitwit whom keeps showing up on my chatbox every once in awhile, just to remind me of the ever-igniting hatred she has towards me. If you are reading this, do keep in mind that all your actions are not triggering me to fight back verbally or be as you are. You can continue to call me whatever your heart desires to call me, and I will close one eye and overlook every single name. But don't you dare drag the one's whom have stood up for me into what was supposed to be between us! If you think by spamming our chatbox's with false accusations will break the tight circle of friendship a handful of my friends and I share, you are dead wrong. It would have to be something so much more hurtful and unforgivable than something this pathetic. I ain't going to beg, but for goodness sake... just leave us alone!
Or better yet, keep trying to break us up until you succeed. But I'm warning you, it's a losing battle.
After having time to shake off whatever tension that was still floating in the air, Edward is effortlessly succeeding in creeping a smile back on my face. His absence for a mere month left me hopeless and numb. The way my heart used to hammer against the walls of my heart for him and the way I'd let out a scream whenever I saw his picture anywhere, was slowing coming to a halt. I'd almost forgotten his presence in my life. Until today. I saw the trailer and instantaneously, his voice made butterflies flutter in my stomach. Just like it did before. My heart is racing in anticipation, yet again!
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Before I pursue my goodbyes, there are just a few more things that need to be said.
The school holidays have begun, yet again. This time, I doubt I'd even feel that semblance of it being the holidays as I have so many things on my hands and in my mind. Most importantly, I need to plant my ass down on the seat at my study table and do some revising. The upcoming exams will be falling on the first week I start school so during this holidays, a lot of sacrificing is going to be done. As stressful and tension-causing as it is, I'm praying for better grades. I just need to do whatever it takes.
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